Do struggle and growth go hand in hand? Listen in to discover how valuable it is to be bad at something.
“Anything Worth Doing…”
You may have heard it said that “anything worth doing, is worth doing right.” Well, we say that anything worth doing, is worth doing wrong.
Both Jenn and Jordan know what an internal struggle it is to not get something right the first time. We see the same tension rise in our kids when they just can’t handle a new task, and give up too easily for lack of trying.
This generation seems to nee a healthy dose of “doing it wrong,” and then getting back up to push through until it’s right (or at least… better).
We need to get comfortable with failure, and in that process, realize that little failures are not permanent. Just because you’re not good at something, doesn’t mean you don’t have the capacity to learn, or to try it again a different way!
Be the Chicken God Made You to Be
This is a reference to a joke we made in the episode, but the idea holds a candle to our need to make braver choices.
Many moms struggle with feeling like “enough” because they’re stuck in the same situation, having done very little to change. It’s risky to do anything new, because new things feel uncomfortable and unnatural, don’t they?
We talk to moms all the time who just don’t feel strong enough to make the changes they need to make in order to step in a new and healing direction.
Why Struggle and Growth Can Be Great
Jamie wanted to stop feeling tired and sluggish all the time. She wanted to have more energy to play with her kids and keep the house in order. She made the brave change to ditch her diet of carbs and sugar, and cleanse her body of those unnatural toxins. After a few weeks and battling intense cravings, her energy levels shot up (even without coffee!), and she could sustain herself much longer than before. She joined an accountability group on Facebook and made new friends who are living this lifestyle.
Kelly knew she needed to establish different routines with her kids and cleanup time, but she avoided the whining and fighting with them for so long. The playroom was an exploded mess every day, until she finally had enough. After some prayer and coaching with another mama, she led the kids through one cleanup sweep, and established new guidelines for their toys. She upheld the rules for a few days.. then weeks, then months until the kids understood the new expectation and kept their toys in order.
Samantha couldn’t understand why she wasn’t able to keep long-term friendships. Sure, she was a little sassy sometimes, but why wasn’t anyone reaching out to her lately? She became lonely, and started blaming others for her unhappiness. One day, she broke down in tears to a mom at her son’s school. This mom suggested that she see a therapist to work out some personal issues. Samantha talked through her insecurities and pride that kept her from being genuine and open with others because she had felt so rejected in the past. Now she has a small group of trusted friends who she can be honest with. They pray for each other often.
Mama, if you feel stuck in a hard place right now, be encouraged that this season will not last forever. Listen in to this episode and discover the unexpected blessings of struggle, and strategies you can use as a mom, and as a woman in progress.
TIME STAMPS
1:50 Struggle is inevitable
2:41 Anything worth doing…
3:56 Be the chicken
5:00 Mama chicken struggles
6:50 STEP 1
7:40 Good and Bad Pain
9:15 Breaking old cycles
11:20 Helping kids understand good and bad pain
15:15 STEP 2
19:30 Confidence through Breastfeeding
23:53 When we don’t lean in to struggle
25:40 Comfort food
26:40 Do Hard Things (book)
29:10 The art of precious scars
30:10 Grace + Imperfection + Hope
32:30 Pomodoro Technique
34:30 How Jordan is rewriting her narrative
Resources Mentioned in this Episode
I Need You to Struggle – Practicing Perseverance
Age Appropriate Responsibilities
Going on a Bear Hunt (children’s book)
Do Hard Things: A Teenaged Rebellion Against Low Expectations
The Entitlement Cure: Finding Success in Doing Hard Things the Right Way
Jennifer Bryant is the wife of a good man and mother of two precious kids. Her favorite things include reading, organizing, blogging, singing with her kids, laughing out loud with her husband, and making food for people. She lives in Honolulu, Hawaii and dreams of taking her family on marvelous adventures across the globe. In the meantime, she blogs about life and family at PracticalFamily.org, and encourages others to build practical skills for healthy communication, simple living, and discover their awesomeness. Read more here.
Jordan Marzan is originally from West Virginia, raised in a family of nine kids, former nanny of five, and a proud home school graduate (thanks mom!). She holds a degree in public relations and works as an actress, ballroom dancer, and podcaster. Much to her delight, Tyler (i.e. “Hawaiian Man-Candy”) agreed to marry her three years ago and they now live in Hawaii. They enjoy long naps on the beach and are trying to find a hobby that somehow combines dancing and racing cars.
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