Parenting teens with joy is possible when we seek to understand and guide them. Let go of the rules long enough to love them well.
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Meet the Author
Connie Albers spent 25 years parenting teens including her five children and 20 years working with teens. She is a popular speaker and writer dedicated to strengthening families, parenting, homeschooling teens, faith-filled living, and leadership. Her practical content inspires and equips parents in the trenches. Connie has been a spokesperson for a Fortune 500 company as well as serving as a director and board member for a nonprofit state homeschool organization. Follow Connie at www.conniealbers.com.
In Parenting Beyond the Rules, you will discover how to raise a teen according to his or her strengths, talents, and personality type, as these things equip teens to manage life.
Connie has helped to shape policies in education as she served on the board of the Florida Parent Educators Association and helped to develop their communications department. She is a strong advocate for the right for parents to choose how to educate their children.
Personalities & Self Awareness
Be a student of your child
What if we applied the same principles of assessments in business to how we approach our teens? What if we leaned in more and got to know them instead of imposing our parental policies and expecting them to fall in line?
Connie says that we often focus on what’s wrong with our kids. “They’re not doing “X” the way that I want.”
“We need to discover what’s RIGHT with them instead of what’s WRONG with them,” she implores.
We can teach our kids how to use their gifts appropriately, using these four basic guidelines:
Assess them without labeling them
The goal: to guide them with the least amount of resistance.
The fact is, rules, limits and boundaries are all good things. They are what keep our kids safe.
But what do we do when the rules stop working? When the child begins pushing back?
“Starve the fear, replace it with truth,” Connie says. “Know who you are, who your child is. You will both grow and change as the years go by.”
Parenting Teens When there’s No Excuse: Enforcing the Rules
Manners, common curtsey, and treating people as valuable human beings has nothing to do with temperament. Children need to learn how to treat others and the effect their attitude has on others.
But especially through the changes like puberty can bring, try your best to be understanding of their situation. (Remember what you were like at that age?)
Let’s practice having grace for the teenaged years. Remember what it was like for you – it was hard to be a teen.
Build a relationship with your teens, observe them, pivot your approach. They change we adjust. It doesn’t minimize your authority.
“When they’re having bad days, it’s not that they want to be that way. Remember not to laugh at them or talk at them, but WITH them.”
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Parenting teens is one of the most challenging seasons of parenting, isn’t it? While this can be a difficult time of transition for parents and teens, there is hope. You can parent well and build a stronger relationship even through the teen years.
In a world filled with distractions and devices, it is possible to guide their hearts and remain the primary influence in their lives. In Parenting beyond the Rules, you will discover how to raise a teen according to his or her strengths, talents, and personality type, as these things equip teens to manage life.